Part IV? Seriously? I have to write a part IV?? This guy just won't let it GO! About an hour and a half later he IMed me again.
Him: Ya know, I actually have no words with which to describe how I feel. They all lack the power I need... Actually, that statement did a fairly good job of it.
Seriously? You IMed me to be redundant?
Me: Well, if you had to pick words that have the right idea but don't quite cut it?
Him: Why would I waste time using inferior words? They'd just lead you to the wrong conclusion, as this whole incident has made quite clear.
I honestly have no idea what he's even referencing there.
Me: I'm just trying to get a basic idea.
Him: "Basic ideas" are good for figuring out what tip to leave a waitress or how fast you should be driving, nothing else.
There's something wrong with him. Seriously.
Me: You're very cynical.
Him: What use is a "basic idea" that leaves out major points?
Me: Because I can hardly tell what direction you're going in.
Him: ....Why don't you make an educated guess?
Me: Because I can't tell if you're angry or just upset.
Him: The difference?
Me: Angry would be specifically mad at me; upset would be just generally mad at what happened.
Him: And being angry with what happened doesn't involve being mad with you?
Me: Not necessarily. It can.
Him: It does.
Me: Okay. You're mad at me. I've apologized. What do you want me to do?
Him: *shrug* That's not my problem anymore.
WTF? How is YOUR being angry not YOUR problem?
Me: Well, clearly you want me to do something, since you're IMing me again.
Him: No, I wanted to make it evident approximately how I feel. Which would, of course, be why I opened with just that rather than asking you for anything.
Oh my god. I'm dealing with a woman. Seriously. Isn't there a Jeff Foxworthy joke about his wife just sitting there going "WELL, we're out of toilet paper.....Yup, there is not a single sheet of toilet paper in this ennttiiiiree house." That's essentially what he's doing. And I'm right there with that husband not doing anything. Why? "Because she didn't tell him to!"
Me: Okay. And?
Him: I'm not sure what you're expecting.
Me: I'm expecting you to tell me exactly what you're doing.
Him: I'm afraid you're going to need to clarify on that.
Me: You IMed me to tell me how you feel and that you're angry with me, and I don't know what it is you're expecting me to do because of it.
Him: I'm sorry.... did I lead you to believe that there was something you should do?
Me: Seeing as how you instigated a conversation. And if the only purpose of that was tell me you're angry at me...
Him: Once again, I find myself repeating the exact same things I said only a message before. I started this conversation to tell you how I felt.
Me: Okay, you wanted to tell me how you feel, but don't actually want me to do anything about the fact that you're angry at me. Is that the point I should be getting then?
Him: What I want you to do is irrelevant unless you come to the conclusions yourself. I have no place to interfere in the decision making process outside of the realm of what I've already done. It's not hard to grasp.
Me: Well if you have no expectations of this conversation, starting it was kind of pointless. If you're going to tell me how you feel, but won't say if there's something you want me to do about it, there's no point in telling me.
Him: Are you utterly daft and devoid of logic?
Me: Clearly.
Can you sense my frustration here?
Me: There's no point of you telling me how you feel if you don't care whether or not I do something about it.
Him: When and where did I say I didn't care.
Me: Well if you're not going to TELL me if there's something you want me to do, I'm not going to try and guess what I'm supposed to do.
Him: Why should I tell you?
Me: Because otherwise I'm not going to know what you want. I've apologized. That's the best I can do for you. So unless you want to actually just be clear and tell me what you want, I'm not likely going to figure it out.
Him: Why do I have to repeat myself so many times to you?
Obviously, saying the same thing over and over really gets your point across if I have no idea what you meant the first time.
Him: What I want you to do is irrelevant unless you come to the conclusions yourself. I have no place to interfere in the decision making process outside of the realm of what I've already done.
Me: Then you're wasting your time. I've apologized. There's not much else I can do for you. I'm not going to bed for forgiveness. I'm not going to waste a bunch of breath trying to convince you not to be angry at me. It's how you feel. Most I can do is apologize and hope someday you get over it.
Him: Every piece of your circular logic reeks. It's getting physically disgusting to hear you continue to ignore the things I say.
Excuse me? MY circular logic?!
Me: Perhaps you're not making yourself clear enough by just repeating the same thing over and over.
Him: How is it not clear?
Me: All you've been telling me is that whatever I do is going to be pointless unless I figure it out by myself. And all I've been telling you is that I'm NOT going to figure it out by myself. All I know to do when I've hurt someone is apologize. And that clearly doesn't count for much with you.
Him: Wow...simple minded.
Right, I'm a blithering idiot. How dare I think apologizing is the appropriate course of action in a situation like this.
Me: God, what the hell do you want from me? You want me to just drop my ex and date you anyway?
Him: At this point, I just want to see what your next move is going to be. That's how detatched from the situation you've forced me to become.
I'm sorry, but since this the third round of IMs from him about this, I'm gonna go ahead and call BULLSHIT on him being. detached.
Him: Also, that did seem to be partially the plan that you had made prior to yesterday.
Yesterday, I agreed to catch a movie with him sometime. He apparently read WAY too far into that.
Me: Well, quite frankly if you can't come right out and tell me what it is you want from me, my next move is going to be to stop asking you and let it go. You can't honestly expect something from me if I don't know what it is.
Him: Correction, your next move was to attempt to tell me what your next move was going to be.
....If I had been having this argument face to face, that's the part at which I would have literally punched him in the face.
Him: Did I expect anything from you after you told me you were taking your ex back?
Me: How should I know?
Him: Oh wait, there I go again, revealing my predictions.
Me: Listen, this is it - if you've got something you want me to do to patch things up with you, spit it out.
Him: I'm afraid I'm not allowed to.
Me: Says who?!
Him: Says me, for the third time.
Me: If you're going to stop yourself from asking for what you want, don't expect it just to be handed to you.
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